Some Excerpts from the Winter issue of the CHMC Magazine.
(Please note that these snippets to not do justice to our excellent quality magazine.)
Technical
Motorcaravans or what?
Some of you will know that we have been looking for a new motorhome for a year or two; 3.5 tons in place of our present 3.8 ton one. (Him indoors heads for 70 in a year's time and this seemed the easiest way to cope with the enforced driving-licence changes.)
Our minimum requirement was that it should be at least as good as the 'van we've got (and as her indoors insists: for all that
money it should be a good deal better).
So, basics: auto-gearbox, spacious L-lounge, spare wheel, no bigger than at present and an adequate payload, after basics of water, fuel and driver: About 21' x 7' 3" (ours is a 316 Mercedes Benz/Autotrail 634L and we bought it in November '01).
So we found . . .? We found we are still shocked at the poor basic design of the 'vans on offer (not to mention their prices). 'Spare wheel sir? (Indrawn breath sucked through teeth). 'Very difficult sir -there's no call for them - but if you insist, we could make the water-tank smaller, squeeze you in an under-body carrier frame, for £1,000 extra -and then you'd have to buy the wheel-and-tyre sir.' And payload? Many are truly silly 120 Kg and the best we found was 350 Kg.
This really did set us thinking. Even with all the (vitally necessary...) extras 11 years have bolted on to it, we still have a net payload
of 600 Kg. So, cut it down to 3.5 tons and we're still left with 300 Kg - better than almost anything new on the market. And we'd still have 'spacious' -we love the open versatility, uncluttered with any central furniture.
So: keep it? It needed some worn-and-torn replacements and all the expert suppliers/ fitters are scattered over England away from our home
(Cambs.).
Then came the really strange bit: Our satellite-dish needed repair and our nearest agent turned out to be Gazeley Horseboxes, Newmarket.
Satellite dish?
Horseboxes?
We found them to be very pleasant and competent, putting in a good hour's work and a complete re-furbishment for £47.50.
So we asked why horses needed satellite dishes. They laughed, said a modern horsebox is a motorcaravan with a dirty bit on the back, and showed us their latest creation to prove it.
And it did: very swish indeed. So, after careful thought and compiling a list of after 100,000-miles-1570-nights-27-countries-visited replacements/new works needed, we took it (the list) and our motorcaravan down the road to Newmarket, where David Gazeley cast a sympathetic and knowledgeable eye over both.
He has an engineer's eye for design and cost-saving and quickly sketched exactly what we wanted done in a more cost-effective form, getting Mike Gazeley (Sales Manager) to do the underbody measurements
2 days later we received their written quotation pricing all their jobs individually. We studied it in delight and accepted it all, but could've just gone for the main items, like:
1) Strip out entire loo/shower room, including walls, and rebuild to new design: install separate shower and washbasin, re-make shower-tray, fit new cupboards: £1.753.00 (Labour £600.00, materials £795.00, shower-tray repair £358.00)
3) Design, make and fit new underbody waste-water tank with dump-valve, fitted beneath shower: £362.00 (labour, £240.00, materials £122.00) Including, we noted carefully, the sturdy steel cradle for it, which didn't after all have to cost £1,000.
4) Replace kitchen sink, drainer, taps and waste pipe with attractive modern design with glass lid: £378.00.
We've just had it all done and are very pleased indeed with everything: very pretty result, superb craftsmanship, cost-effective: Exactly on time, exactly as planned.
So we like David, Mike and their firm.
Hooray for horseboxes!
Coffee Break
(The lighter side of the magazine)
Don’t take your Parrot on a Cruise
A magician worked on a cruise ship and the audience was different each week so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the Magician did every trick.
Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look It’s not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table!" Or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"
The magician was furious but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the Captain's' parrot.
Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank, drowning almost all who were on board. The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea, as fate would have it ... With the parrot.
They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word.
This went on for several days and finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not hold back any longer and said...
"OK, I give up. Where have you hidden the ship?
Motorcaravans or what?
Some of you will know that we have been looking for a new motorhome for a year or two; 3.5 tons in place of our present 3.8 ton one. (Him indoors heads for 70 in a year's time and this seemed the easiest way to cope with the enforced driving-licence changes.)
Our minimum requirement was that it should be at least as good as the 'van we've got (and as her indoors insists: for all that
money it should be a good deal better).
So, basics: auto-gearbox, spacious L-lounge, spare wheel, no bigger than at present and an adequate payload, after basics of water, fuel and driver: About 21' x 7' 3" (ours is a 316 Mercedes Benz/Autotrail 634L and we bought it in November '01).
So we found . . .? We found we are still shocked at the poor basic design of the 'vans on offer (not to mention their prices). 'Spare wheel sir? (Indrawn breath sucked through teeth). 'Very difficult sir -there's no call for them - but if you insist, we could make the water-tank smaller, squeeze you in an under-body carrier frame, for £1,000 extra -and then you'd have to buy the wheel-and-tyre sir.' And payload? Many are truly silly 120 Kg and the best we found was 350 Kg.
This really did set us thinking. Even with all the (vitally necessary...) extras 11 years have bolted on to it, we still have a net payload
of 600 Kg. So, cut it down to 3.5 tons and we're still left with 300 Kg - better than almost anything new on the market. And we'd still have 'spacious' -we love the open versatility, uncluttered with any central furniture.
So: keep it? It needed some worn-and-torn replacements and all the expert suppliers/ fitters are scattered over England away from our home
(Cambs.).
Then came the really strange bit: Our satellite-dish needed repair and our nearest agent turned out to be Gazeley Horseboxes, Newmarket.
Satellite dish?
Horseboxes?
We found them to be very pleasant and competent, putting in a good hour's work and a complete re-furbishment for £47.50.
So we asked why horses needed satellite dishes. They laughed, said a modern horsebox is a motorcaravan with a dirty bit on the back, and showed us their latest creation to prove it.
And it did: very swish indeed. So, after careful thought and compiling a list of after 100,000-miles-1570-nights-27-countries-visited replacements/new works needed, we took it (the list) and our motorcaravan down the road to Newmarket, where David Gazeley cast a sympathetic and knowledgeable eye over both.
He has an engineer's eye for design and cost-saving and quickly sketched exactly what we wanted done in a more cost-effective form, getting Mike Gazeley (Sales Manager) to do the underbody measurements
2 days later we received their written quotation pricing all their jobs individually. We studied it in delight and accepted it all, but could've just gone for the main items, like:
1) Strip out entire loo/shower room, including walls, and rebuild to new design: install separate shower and washbasin, re-make shower-tray, fit new cupboards: £1.753.00 (Labour £600.00, materials £795.00, shower-tray repair £358.00)
3) Design, make and fit new underbody waste-water tank with dump-valve, fitted beneath shower: £362.00 (labour, £240.00, materials £122.00) Including, we noted carefully, the sturdy steel cradle for it, which didn't after all have to cost £1,000.
4) Replace kitchen sink, drainer, taps and waste pipe with attractive modern design with glass lid: £378.00.
We've just had it all done and are very pleased indeed with everything: very pretty result, superb craftsmanship, cost-effective: Exactly on time, exactly as planned.
So we like David, Mike and their firm.
Hooray for horseboxes!
Coffee Break
(The lighter side of the magazine)
Don’t take your Parrot on a Cruise
A magician worked on a cruise ship and the audience was different each week so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the Magician did every trick.
Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look It’s not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table!" Or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"
The magician was furious but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the Captain's' parrot.
Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank, drowning almost all who were on board. The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea, as fate would have it ... With the parrot.
They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word.
This went on for several days and finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not hold back any longer and said...
"OK, I give up. Where have you hidden the ship?